Friday, August 24, 2007

Fidel Castro dies, no one cares

fidel castro dies miami police department 4pm EST Florida Cuba Communist dictator dead Raul

MIAMI - Americans around the United States "couldn't care less" about the much-anticipated death of Cuba's Communinist dictator.

"I'm three months behind rent," said Chicago resident James Hartford in an interview with the Dissociated Press from his tenement apartment building. "I don't really see how that news affects me."

Hartford's sentiments echo that of Mary Brown, an Atlanta native who declined to discuss the issue.

"Frankly, I don't even know who that is," Brown said.

The news of Castro's heavily rumored demise came Friday afternoon, after much deliberation and the ironically miscalculated reaction of Americans by the Federal Bureau of Investigation.

"We understand that people will storm the streets and pillage the towns in celebration of this news," FBI Director Nate Michaels said. "We will wait until after Friday afternoon rush hour traffic diminishes before we make any official announcement."

Michaels said that the FBI is working with local police departments to "beef up security" around sensitive perimeters and municipal structures to deter the anticipated "free-for-all" expected after the official announcement.


"I understand this is an exciting day," Michaels said, "but our country will work through this - hopefully, in an orderly fashion."

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