ONEONTA, Ala. - A single yellow capsuled pill baffled area man Jeff Bridges Monday.
"It was just lying there on my desk, and I thought, 'What is this for? Where did it come from?'"Bridges reported.
Bridges, who denies ever having come in contact with a "pill like it", scoured his memory for a good ten minutes, trying to figure out what use the pill could have.
"At first, I was thinking maybe it was a cold medicine tablet, but those usually come in plastic casing and look red. Then, I thought it might have been one of those diet pills, but the only ones I usually take have clear capsules and are powdered. So, I'm wondering what the fuck it could possibly be."
Bridges wondered if "[Tommy] Shaker left it here" after that "massive, bitching party we threw last week" but "nobody really does drugs like that", but it could've belonged to that "trashy strung-out scank that [John] Bishop brought - you know, the one everybody was laughing at."
A phone call to Bishop negated that theory, so Bridges theorized that it may have been a leftover vitamin from the nutritionaly regimen he put himself on "to get healthy" for a total of two and a half days.
Bridges, who decided to end the debate with the experiment approach, promptly swallowed the yellow pill and collapsed dead on his desk fifteen to twenty seconds later.
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